We work and then we get something (money, satisfaction). We do excercise so that we get thinner and fitter. We cultivate friends so that we feel appreciated and accompanied. We care for the environment so that the environment gives us things to live.
We do things for a purpose, even if that is to help or just be nice, we chose how to spend the time we have in our lives. Occasionally, we stop and think, we balance out things, we assess how much we time put in and how much we get out of our efforts. Yes, we are all accountants of time. We account for the time we work, we pray, we do yoga or go to the movies. What a waste of time we say when things do not work the way we want them to.
With parenthood I am finding that this time accounting mentality does not work. I have said before that I find useless advice that things will get better. We put in time and some day we will see the benefits. We hope the children will turn out to be ok. They will love us back. They will let us sleep. They will smile and say 'papa' or 'mama'. Time will tell...but please tell us soon!
Time accounting does not work because children give us more than we expect. They are just themselves. They do not know about costs and benefits, time sheets, salaries, promotions, investments, pensions, quality of life, public debt, politics, technology, businesses. They do things because...they can. They do not seem to expect anything else than be loved and protected. They do not keep a balanced lifestyle, where they know where their time goes. They do not carry watches.
Going mad for me means that sometimes I have shift my time agenda, and then something has to give. Today it was lunch. It was also time with my twins...but they keep forgiving me, they just smile when they see me, without asking where I was and why I was late. I just feel they make me a better human being.
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